Monday, March 27, 2006

Waffle Waffle Waffle

My Dad used to say that, in a bit of a high-pitched voice, 'waffle waffle waffle'. He'd do it just being silly. I seem to remember it coming initially from some tv ad.. but I can't remember which one.

Oh nevermind. I got another rejection letter last week. This job I had higher hopes for. I'd seen the ad online, but couldn't get the application page to open up. So I went directly into the branch that had the opening and spoke with someone there. They gave me an alternate address to send in my CV, which I did. *huge sigh* Rejection again.

It's seriously getting to me. I want to make a real contribution here. Not that I'll ever be able to give equal to Lynnie-Lou's salary... I don't have the training or experience to reach that high. But I'd like to be at least on par with what I was earning when I left the US.

I can't help taking it all personally.

Last year, I went on file with a job agency. I got ONE call from them, asking if I wanted a call centre job. OMG, shoot me now if that's all I'm qualified for!! Sorry, no thanks, I said. And that was the last I heard from them.

I don't want to apply anymore. I don't want to have hope or work myself up trying to be creative or sell myself in yet another cover letter.

This can't continue. At some point, I'm going to regain my determination and the drive to push through this negativity. In the meantime, cue that Daddy-noise; 'waffle waffle waffle'...

Twice, not long ago, I was asked to take on more responsibility at the Kwikie. Both times I said no. There was a war of immaturity going on amongst the checkout employees and I worried they'd never let me make a difference. There was also the matter of a large sum of cash going missing from the office. So I felt justified in my response. Who wanted that?

Now I'm going to apply for that position. Again, they need someone in the cash office. I can do money. It's also a shift-leader type of job. I'd be managing the other checkout clerks, solving problems and scheduling breaks, making the front run smoothly. This would give me a chance to update my management experience AND bump my pay from minimum wage to £7.80 an hour.

Kwik Save was also taken over by Somerfield's last year. We had a year to get our profits up while they decided what to do with the new acquistions. The year is up now and Somerfield decided to sell off the Kwikie name, close a bunch of the stores and convert others to their Somerfield brand. We're lucky, in that our place is one of the conversions, due to be complete by May 31st.

This doesn't automatically solve any of the problems that first scared me off. But I think the big change going on will make it easier to facilitate change on the shop floor. The clerks could be unsettled enough to take on board new attitudes in their work. I know I can help curb some of the immaturity and maybe even instill better techniques for great customer service.

I told Dan I was interested, to let me know when the position was officially open for application. He's been a real flake lately, so I also spoke to one of the other managers, Mick. He told me that Somerfield is sending in someone from their HR dept to speak with all of us, one-on-one, within the next few weeks. That's the person I need to speak with.

So. That's what I'm doing. I feel like a whiny kid, dragging my feet, saying, 'oh all riiiiiight. If I must.' It's not like I'd have to do it forever. I could still apply elsewhere if the perfect job came up.

Then I laugh at the assumption I'll even get this job in the first place ~~


NursePam said...

Go for it Kim! This could be your ultimate ticket. Once you have a year or 2 under your belt with this sort of experience and references in Liverpool to back it up, people will look at you more closely. Don't lose heart. It will come. (((((hugs)))))

~ nellenelle said...

*hugs* Kim...

not much I say can change how you feel, not until you are able to look back at how you found your job and worked at it... but you will... you've heard it before, we believe in you! And my ears/eyes/whatever will listen anytime.

Trop said...

I hope it all works out for you. Court has been going through the same thing here. She's in a part time job at the college and wants better. Her job offers no benefits (she can't benefit from my benefits as my spouse, since our union is illegal). Moreover, the job is not in her field (criminal justice). Facing the rejection that comes with job hunting is so demoralizing.

~ nellenelle said...

*sending you a little extra good thoughts for your quest...*